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Mew

DON'T LOOK INTO IT-Aww, but it's so ADOWABLE!

Mew is a cat looking Pokeymon that stands on two legs. Not four. Not seventy-nine. Two. It is a psychic Pokemon, so it can use hypnotism on anyone it wishes, causing them all to love it like it's their own unborn baby. If you think it's cute, it's probably too late. It has many other psychic powers as well. They are probably all linked to permeate-free milk in some way.

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Mew was at first an illegal Pokemon. It obtained this status by vandalizing windmills. Twelvies could never get their filthy mits on it, mainly because they spent all their time looking for it under a truck. HaXz0rs found a way to use it in battle though. Now, with the new Pokemon games, Nintendo has rectified this issue. It's been made incredibly easy to hack an entire crop of Mew, so now everyone has one under their bed. It looks like a pink fetus, stands on two legs, and has an eye. Two. Two eyes. Mew can also have the ability to fly if it believes hard enough.

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Mewamoto

Mew concept art, affectionately known as 'Mewamoto'

Mew was created by Gamefreak at an especially rowdy (yeah right) party. Dark Lord Satoshi Tajiri had just overdosed on Nintendope and Miyamoto walked up to him. Satoshi pictured Miyamto as a fetus and pink-colored. Tajiri immediately pitched the idea to the rest of Nintendo and they accepted (because they were on Nintendope) but later on decided to make Mew have the face of a cat beacause Japan loves cats. Everybody has heard of Mew, especially twelvies. Any twelvie lucky enough to get a Mew from an event or from a Mew farmer is sure to use it at level 5 and make it hate them.